Thursday, March 28, 2013


"Anything that can go wrong, will go wrong....with your water hose."

The Half Kink
I have so many kinds of kinks, I've decided to name them.
Maybe I should name them after wrestling holds. I've always loved the term 
'half nelson'.  

But as you may know, my fellow gardeners, this is only the beginning.
Close your eyes and imagine what's next. Ready?
This is not just that 'never will get freed' tire hold.
This is a kink PLUS the tire hold. 
Are you feeling my pain yet?
I call this the 'just pull on me and see what happens' pre-kink formation.
It's as if my water hose can predict my every move.
Here's a better version of loop drama.
As you pull you just KNOW it's going to do something bad.
In fact, there's already a kink up at the top.
This took some talent. Is there a contest we can enter so that gardeners can win valuable prizes?
I could enter the Olympics with this one. I wish I could say I 'posed' the hoses, but I didn't.
These are actual scenes from a day of wrestling watering.
My last Murphy's Law has a new twist. (pardon the pun)

"If there is a twig on the ground, the water hose will somehow
wrap around it and then kink."

So...after a day spent watering the plants, it's time to relax to some music...
Maybe not! Hope you enjoyed today's garden humor.
 And may all your garden hoses behave!
Happy Spring.


  1. Kinky hoses, always a pain! Never mind! :)

  2. Ha-ha!! Truly funny! I can relate. Love the ending.

  3. Too funny. I have even put splints on my hoses when they always bend at the same place. The secret is, of course, to buy a very good, heavy hose. I have 2 that never kink. Also the hoses we use in our trailer water. They are my favorite. They don't have chemicals and they are light and never kink.

  4. This was hilarious! So classic! That's exactly how my hoses look - every time I use them. I finally broke down this year and got one of those silly looking "expanding" hoses - we'll see if I can kink even it!

  5. I laughed so much I started coughing violently. You need to depict what happens when you have four hoses all kinking together in unison(like a writhing mass of snakes) and you missed the part about them catching on the bench, the raised bed, the fig tree, the heavy garden planter, and so forth. I really think hoses get together for a weekly conference to figure out how to frustrate us.

  6. David, You are too funny! I'm still laughing...

  7. This is so funny and true! I bought a curly no-kink hose that still kinks. Even my soaker hoses kink. They're conspiring against us!

  8. I feel your pain. I wrestle with a 100 foot one.

  9. Oh yes, that looks very familiar - both :D


I always appreciate your comments & questions! Happy Gardening from David/ Tropical Texana

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